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I am tired of being frustrated, confused and lied to about men, pornography and lust.

I am a college-aged girl dealing with the frustrations of dating.

Scott now lives in the Louisville, Ky., area with his wife, Rachel, and son, William, where he works as an attorney and serves as an elder of Third Avenue Baptist Church.

God is graciously holding out to you a life of freedom, joy, and purpose.

As you say, honest conversation with single women on this topic is in short supply, so let me try to offer straight answers on a few of the issues you raised.

Sadly, use of pornography is extremely widespread, even among Christian men. No, but both secular and Christian surveys regularly indicate that the vast majority (over 70 percent) of men age 18-24 view it regularly (at least weekly) – and those are just the guys who are willing to admit it.

My first college boyfriend made me aware of the problems men have with pornography, masturbation and lust.

If he means to marry you and to honor your marriage covenant, he must be fighting the good fight and seeing significant victory, though not necessarily perfection.Having said all that, I personally know a number of brothers who have never viewed pornography regularly and some who have never viewed it at all.Still, as a practical and statistical matter, a single Christian woman looking to marry may well have to contend with a current or past struggle with pornography in the man she considers marrying. Like most sins – especially those that grow to operate like an addiction – abandoning the use of pornography can be very difficult to overcome, but no sin is impossible to overcome with God.I feel very naive about the topic, and honestly as a woman, have a hard time relating and understanding how to handle these situations. I want to get to the specific questions you’ve asked, so I won’t take a lot of space to go over the horrible problems caused by the use of pornography (most of us would agree on them anyway), but just so I’ve said it: Pornography is a destroyer of lives.Its use is always sin, and there is no legitimate place for any use of it in the life of a follower of Christ.

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